Comments on: It’s Complicated

By: Ms. Florida Transplant

Ms. Florida Transplant — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:12:43 +0000

First, my ex lost his job about a month after our divorce. It sucked, so I understand a little of what you’re going through. I was kind & let him delay alimony payments until he got on his feet.

Second, it will get ugly. However, the whole thing may not get ugly enough to justify needing a lawyer. Just know that when things get ugly, it’s time to take a break rather than letting it excalate.

Good luck with everything!

Thanks, I’m not looking for alimony, but if he wants the house he needs to buy me out and I’m willing to structure a payment plan for that. I am hoping for the less ugly as possible scenario. He has a friend who was actually laughing and joking with his ex-wife when they were at the lawyer’s signing the finaly paperwork. While I don’t see us being that amicable, I also don’t see us going “15 round over a wagon wheel coffeetable”

By: GoodbyeGirl

GoodbyeGirl — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 18:39:46 +0000

ugh. I dread lawyers. I am actually taking things into my own hands, because much like you I have handled everything for the past 15 years, Ex is not about to lend a hand in my departure though we have agreed to split amicably, and neither of us have the funds kicking around to pay someone to do paperwork for us.
A co-worker of mine filed her divorce online and while she has yet to file the paperwork with the court she suggested http://www.completecase.com. Apparently it was recommended on Oprah too.
For $500 I can file and refile if needed. I had hoped to get this done over the weekend, but I got caught up in other stuff.

I had to pretend for practically my entire relationship with Ex. It’s no fun and I wish you a quick end to the fake smiles.

By: Singlegal

Singlegal — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 18:34:39 +0000

Hey ~ thanks for the cross reference! Check your link to One Date Wonder, though.
Why doesn’t he want to tell his parents? He needs too. That’s just going to get more complicated. Tell him you are telling yours, and if word spreads, he won’t want them to find out by “word of mouth”. I know we’d all love to spare them but they need to know.
Good luck, as always.
SG

Thanks on catching the broken link, I http://’s once too often.

I think telling his parents makes it real, makes him a failure, who knows. I told him to blame me 100%, I don’t care if they hate me I won’t have to deal with them ever again. I thought through telling my parents and my brother and his wife, I don’t have problems with telling them. Telling my Grandparents will be hard. Given we barely see them and Grandpa is turning 90 this year I wouldn’t be surprised if my mother tells me not to tell them at all. My family is weird like that.